These days to go to sleep early is not really on the things-i-want-to-do list. Since the mid-semester test started I always sleep late and never any early. Last week was the craziest one 'cause everyday I went home late night. After school-PD Team meeting-science lesson-practice/workshop-home. Always like that and my body was screwed up. haha But it's a great week also because of the G12ACE event on Saturday-Sunday. It's the first time GPS is out to public, last Saturday. We hope to meet more opportunities soon! But maybe not for me? Taking a break in the senior year. What I said in the previous year. So be it.

This week was a week where I focused on school. School and the friends. High school is ending soon and I feel like I'm not ready. Everything just feels too fast. I feel like I haven't done this and that, so much things I couldn't catch up. Sometimes I was too busy dancing, or loving, or anything and forgetting to enjoy my high school life. And now a little regret.

So as you can see, this blog's background has turned black, even blackier. Black is more me. Yeah. A little no lead intermezzo. Anyway watch my YouTube channel to see videos of O4 Crew (my school dance crew since 2010) and enjoy! --> Click.

You know, yesterday I watched Final Destination 5 and it brought up something to me. Yeah, the movie gave me chills, a bad chill about death. How will my death be? Well everyone dies someday. You, me, every single human. Will it be hurt or scary or what? I don't actually have to be concerned about that. But thinking about death gave me a hit about life. I only live ONCE. And I realize that there's too much stupid and useless things that I've done. I mean, sometimes I know they're useless but there's not a strong force inside me to cut the rope and move the other way. And if I live like a badass and die, and go to hell and suffer more killing and more massacre for me, no, I don't want my life to end like that. So I had this little passion of starting to struggle to give my best, be a great person to bless people, closer to God, and live everyday like it's the end of the world.. This kind of passion is fragile and it easily subsides. But yeah..talkin' 'bout one chance of living..mehn. We should really try to make it the best one, or nothing at all.

How is love going for me? It's going well. Means: I'm starting to be more able and able to forget that person. I think I had enough and spent my whole high school thinking and daydreaming about that person. Yeah, we had stories but when I see it through it's a weird and too fairytale-ish story which is not really good 'cause I get this thought sometimes that we were only playing and trying to structure our own feeling and everything and that we can't do at all with each others' busy activities and arghh you know that I can't have you with me with an attitude of you that drives me crazy although it isn't right now 'cause my feeling for you isn't really happening anymore and things started to get normal which is nice and so that means the end of the line for us!!!! *INHALES*
Not funny.

Finally I made a 100%(uhh..90?) choice that I'm taking Communication Faculty next year for my university life. It's gonna be Petra Christian University. Unless there's a kind and daring and "supporting" university which provide a better Communication Faculty in other place. I will reconsider and discuss with my family. What makes me a traitor here is that I'm entering Petra but I'm promoting UC to everyone! Yeah, I actually like UC better because of their entrepreneur program, which will lead many young entrepreneur to build Indonesia more to a developed country. And that they build great soul of business for their students. But bad thing is they don't provide a Communication Faculty for me! :( I could take Psychology Faculty but I can learn from books sold everywhere. What's more is that they don't even pay me AT ALL for promoting and convincing my friends to enter! :(:(:( Talking about slavery.

Okay that's all I wanna throw up. Thanks. Adios.
Don't forget to clean up.