It's about an hour to December and I'm about to drop these behind.
The month's ending in rain and I hope while it falls dawn, it washes away every stains left on my life. It's been exhausting, the last days of November. It started out wonderful, even more wonderful in the middle. When suddenly wonderful turns out to be tiring in the end. Don't know how it happened but maybe it's as they say, "Don't get caught up in the beauty".

I can say that I would carry something through the next days of December. But probably the best thing is that it is left behind. That something came and I was curious and mesmerized to know that there is such coincidence happening so many times already that it makes everything look real and magical. Me and the thing. I said I carried on, but it made me stop for awhile to rest and drink my thirst away. Drinking it was sweet. At times it was bitter. There are clearer waters ahead and I knew I deserve a lot better. But somehow I'm captivated in this place that I used to know. It got me weakened all over again when I knew I was tough. I was ready to fall off a cliff believing that I was gonna be alright.
I am an open book. Thought I would relive an undone writing in the previous book on this new page. An undone writing that I used to wish for it to be done, or at least to be written longer. But seems like there's no such story to continue it. I was trying to make a crumbled paper perfect. I was trying to plant on a dry soil. I tried to foresee something good but there is actually nothing left in this place. It's starting to have me believing that this isn't gonna work. Maybe I should stop wondering and waiting for something that will only come in a quarter to never. Maybe I should just write a new beginning with something else.

I drank. I was thirsty to my best. I believed in a story I tried to make up.
Thirst, urges, blood, miss, hope, lone, touch, rage, crush, love.
The thoughts that are getting me to the lunatic realm.
Let the rain wash away everything.
I'm leaving these things right here.
Let's carry on.